FANGIRLS EVERYWHERE NEED TO SEE THIS VIDEO:
Yes folks, that is various members of the 2010 Blackhawks, including Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews, having a popsicle eating contest. SHIT IS GAY.
From this video, we learn:
-Canadians are clearly much better at eating cold things than Americans. Draw whatever conclusions you feel like from that statement.
-JONATHAN TOEWS CAN FIT A WHOLE POPSICLE INTO HIS MOUTH AT ONCE. To quote Kaner, “Jesus.”
-Dustin Byfuglien is on a diet. Who knew?
-Kane has, as he so helpfully tells us, sensitive teeth.
-The 2010 ‘Hawks were adorbs. Almost adorbs enough for me to be okay with them having beaten the Flyers.
-Side note—what the fuck is P. Kane wearing? His hair is tragic enough without that headband thing. Just saying.
-Someone, somewhere, in the Blackhawks PR department thought it would be a good idea to have Laddie, Buff, Tazer, and Kaner engage in a contest in which they had to race to eat phallically shaped objects. I want to shake that person’s hand.
OBVIOUSLY KANER IS CHANNELING APOLO OHNO.
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